Evil Monkeys and Mental Bananas

My glass of wine is half empty. Oh wait, or is it half full? Either way it tastes great and I will be sad to see it end! My mind is all over the place, and it is hard to pinpoint down the thoughts I am trying to process. For a long time there, I had been feeling such a weightlessness to my existence, and I must say it was refreshing for a change. For the first time in my life, I had been focused on only the pleasurable experiences, because it seemed that is all there was to be had! There was no weight on my shoulders, forcing me to trudge at a slower pace, carrying myself as if a collapse was inevitable in the near future. I slept like a baby at night, woke up with a smile on my face, and carried it throughout my day as if I had not a care in the world! Satisfaction was the theme of this phase in my life. Because that is what I see my life as so far, a series of phases leading up to any one of a number of supposed possible outcomes.

But all of a sudden, the weight has reappeared like a monkey on my back swooping down from the trees. He is bouncing around and grabbing at my hair and has become a total nuisance with his insistence that I feed him my Mental Bananas. I am telling you now, people, I do not have many of those banana's left, and if I give them all to him, I'm going to just become a Product of the Monkey, a slave to his incessant demands to appease his appetite for my Soul! Dramatic? Yes. But, at least you get my point.

My life is great. I feel I have learned how to be patient, optimistic (annoyingly so) and more self aware. I am trying to hold onto the things in my life I know should be lifting me up, above and beyond even the trees, staying out of reach of those incessant Evil Monkeys. I suppose we all have to come down for a reality check once in a while (oh no! Does this mean my eyes are going to open again??), but I hope that not all reality checks are disruptive forces sweeping through your life like a tornado, destroying the pretty little picture of life you had created for yourself just so you can start rebuilding it over again from scratch. I would like to think that some are more like the first warm spring rain that washes away the last of the snow to reveal something a little more natural, beautiful and warm. Something that causes you to breathe in deeply for a change, and say, 'this is what I have been waiting for'.

So, what is it I have I been waiting for?